This post was originally written in August, 2018 and updated in December, 2018.
I want to thank each and every person, with love, for taking the time to visit me here and read my blog posts. I hope it has been interesting, educational and that they have added some mystical beauty to your lives.
You may have noticed that I have not been writing as much lately and there is a good reason for that. In June, I was diagnosed with early stage breast cancer. I had surgery on August 6th (partial mastectomy) and I will have radiation treatment all during the month of September.
In February, March and April of this year (2018), I felt a strong push to finally create this blog and go public with this information about Robin’s ongoing life and our twin soul connection. I was finally able to push past all of the internal resistance to sharing my experiences. I felt like Robin and others in Spirit really wanted this work done, so with some fear, I agreed to write and publish my posts.
Then, on May 2nd, during my monthly breast exam, I felt a lump in my left breast. I was quite alarmed as you can image. I immediately scheduled a mammogram the day I found the lump. From there, I went through a series of ultrasounds, MRI’s and biopsy, which determined I had breast cancer. Due to my self-exam, I caught it early at stage 1 and my prognosis is very good. I am expected to be fine, for which I am very grateful. Still, it’s been a scary time for me and Julian as you can imagine. I continued to write as many posts as I could during this period because it was very therapeutic for me. It made me feel like I was still me.
I have greatly loved writing my blog posts about and for Robin, but sometimes I don’t have the mental energy and concentration. I’m so glad I followed my guidance to get this blog up and going while I had the energy to focus.
In my Background section, I wrote about how important it is to follow a path with heart because we don’t know how much time we have here. I’m so glad that I communicated those feelings to you from the outset. When I received my cancer diagnosis, I can honestly say that I felt so glad that I have been living a path with heart by writing this blog and writing my truth about Robin.
If there is something you really want to do, I encourage you to do it to the best of your ability and not put it off. Even if you know you are going to be ok, a lot of time and energy is spent at the doctors when you have cancer (or other illnesses) and you may not feel like doing that project you wanted to do for so long. If you can, do the project when you have the energy and when you feel well. If I had wanted to start Paisley and Poppies now, I would not have been able to do it. I’m so grateful that I can now build on the foundation I already created, not build the foundation itself.
Do twin souls often have the same illnesses? Perhaps. Robin had a different kind of cancer than I have. I am very blessed to have a twin that knows what I’m going through. I have shared this experience with Robin every step of the way and his presence with me has given me great comfort. I have felt his love with me, encouraging me not to worry. I pray and chant at his altar, for him and with him, for Julian, for my healing and his ongoing healing. Now I understand much better what he went through, because all cancer patients have similar fears and worries as we face our mortality in our own way. Even if you are going to be ok like I expect to be, you still face your mortality.
Going through this experience also makes me love and respect Robin even more as I see the spiritual strength that he had while ill and deteriorating. He was still interviewing and singing while he was ill. Many people have no idea how much strength that took Robin to carry on being himself, singing and interviewing, when he had only months left to live in the physical world. I ask you to acknowledge Robin’s great inner strength if you feel so inclined. Let him know that you can see that in him, as I’m sure he would greatly appreciate that. He has a beautiful voice and smile, but as great as that is, he is much more than that. Thank you!
I wanted to communicate openly with you so you know what’s going on and that my not writing has to do with my health status. I will keep writing as often as I can. I have several blog posts in the queue right now. I appreciate your patience with me and I invite you to check back when you can. If you subscribe, you will receive the post in your email when I have a new one.
Thanks once again for taking time out of your day to visit with me here. Robin appreciates it too and we both consider it a blessing.
With Love,
Christina
Update 12/17/2018:
Hello! I just wanted to let you know that I am doing very well with my recovery. I finished radiation treatment in September. It took me all of October to recover from the side effects. I did not need chemotherapy.
Finally in November, I started feeling better. I’m still not back to my pre-cancer strength completely and I need a lot of rest. But, I’m still physically active, ride my bike, and can manage to walk 2 miles without strain. Before I had cancer, I was walking 3.5 miles several times a week. That was important to me and I would like to get back to walking like that.
I take medication now to prevent the cancer from coming back. I have only a 3% chance of recurrence which means I have a 97% chance of not getting breast cancer again. I will focus on the 97% with joy!
I will have a mammogram and ultrasound done early in 2019. I’m expecting good results!
I love writing posts for this website as it continues to be very therapeutic for me. When I write, I am reminded that my connection to Love, to God, and to Robin is very strong. I do my best to write as often as I can.
I find it spiritually interesting that I had cancer around the same time I started this blog. Maybe they were meant to coincide. There is something about having cancer that gives you an edge that you did not have before. In a way, having this illness gave me the strength and courage to write from my heart what I had been reluctant to share for so long. There’s always a silver lining!
If any of my readers are dealing with cancer, please know that my heart goes out to you and I wish you the greatest love, strength and recovery.
Happy Holidays and a very blessed New Year in 2019!
Love,
Christina